That is all. Carry on…

So yeah, no posts lately. I vacillate between understanding and upset when I think about us finally in the same city and not seeing each other. There wouldn’t have been a let down if there hadn’t been a willing lead-up to it. It’s in the pst now though, so I’ll try to cut it loose (because I’m so good at that).

My dog is stoned out of his mind. He has to be on meds five days prior to the surgery, so he’s living in a cloud. I can’t imagine keeping him in a crate for a month! How the fuck is he supposed to do that? And how can I leave him at home every day? Of course someone will come by mid day to walk him (briefly), but still. He gets so lonely. I’m watching him chew a bully stick. It seems that no matter where I lay down a towel for him to eat it over, he ends up with his head off the edge, drooling onto the white carpet (now a dingy white thanks to him). The maid hasn’t been able to come in weeks, and the dog hair everywhere is absurd. He’s shedding his winter undercoat. You could literally make another dog with just the hair around my living room.

Anywho, you… that’s it for now. Peace in the Middle East, muthafucka. X

…dog woke me at 4:36am to go out, which is earlier than normal. So I don my robe and slippers, yellow stained mouthguard still in place, and go out the back door to the street behind my house. It’s uncharacteristically cold here: 41 degrees. He immediately pulls me down the hill, which isn’t where he normally pees, and then up the other street. It’s dark, I’m in a robe and slippers, mouth full of plastic, being pulled further and further up a hill away from my house in the freezing cold. He finally stops and unleashes a small mountain of poop. Poor guy. Bad tummy. Then back home for two more hours of intermittent sleep. Tomorrow I’m up at 5:30 to drive him up to Ventura County, one and a half hours north, to a see an orthopedic specialist for an injury to his shoulder. The poor boy needs surgery. It’s the cone of shame for two weeks and six weeks of recovery for him. But he’s my boy, so what can a father do

Nothing?

Does your (warranted) fear of seeing me in Nola mean that we won’t see each other? Or was it just those reminiscent circumstances?

https://youtu.be/9gRq8hncqvM

It’s as much mine. We’ve been up and down so many times, and when I can look back clearly, I see my mistakes, and often cringe at the moments missed.

God, was the thought of seeing you was exciting. It’d be a nervous time for sure, but I thought I would be with you like a good old friend; love, familiarity and respect. Maybe one day then.

Regardless of whether or not I’m in NY, want to shoot for that weekend anyway? If so, the if not NY then where?