I decided to go anyway. I’m going to hang out with my friend Abel, whom I rarely see. I’m sorry we won’t be hanging out in the Rockies together. It would have been fun. 

What happened to you?  Another guy?  Sanity? Scorching ghonnorhea?  You are the bar against which all other women are compared.  Why were we so dysfunctional?  Why are we still?  I think I’m getting better though. I’m dating a bit, but no one’s lighting a fire. I keep wondering if it’s you, the bar, or me, the retard.  Either way it’s my issue to deal with and I’m working through it. Just because I won’t be your putz doesn’t mean I don’t love you. 

An event to make one feel the appropriate amount of universal insignificance.  I went to Nashville with Guy and Brian for three days to see the full eclipse, and also to have a good time (duh).  We learned quite a bit about each other’s “isms” on that one, but thankfully we made it through the other side remaining friends.  I’m off to Denver next week for a couple days, then Nola the following week. It’s tough not working 😊

Suck

So I’ll take it by your silence that you’re either in a lover’s arms and/or it was a whimsical idea that came and went. It was a nice thought though. 

I got a missed call from Angela yesterday. I could only come up with three reasons she’d call: 1) pocket dial, 2) to tell me to stay the way away from you, or 3) to tell me that something happened to you. I’d lean towards number 2, but want to make sure you’re ok. Are you?  

You are my drug

I’ve been thinking about it non-stop since our barrage of texts. My mind is all over your body. 

It’s been a whole year and I still have the last two cupcakes in the freezer. With much much joy and ceremony, I’m going to devour them tomorrow. I miss you today. I would have had my way with you 57 times had I seen you in New Orleans. 

I made it home. The dog did surprisingly well. Other than a road trip as a vacation, I’m not doing that for work again. It’s just too much. Other than Stern or news, I mostly listened to the Springsteen channel on SiriusXM. I wish I had been a bigger fan earlier in life. He’s really such an incredible songwriter and he imbues his songs with such emotion. Every song was the story of us or just you. I must have listened to five different versions of Thunder Road, but the best was the live piano acoustic version. It’s so easy to overlook the poetry when there’s a big sound behind it.  That was a lot of road with a lot of time to think, remember, ponder, laugh, cry, and try to figure things out.  Why has our timing always been so terrible?  Timing, distance… and yet…